Well, if there's anything I've learnt this AY in school, I've learnt not to judge a book by its cover and be slow to jump to conclusions. You never know who the guy sitting next to you actually is and what he actually knows. For all you know, he might be a PSC scholar, he might be on SAF scholarship, SPF scholarship, be really good at the piano, the violin, or really anything at all. Sometimes we are quick to judge from a person's face, a person's general outward appearance, a person's conduct during that very first time you saw him/her. At the end of the day, you really never know how a person is like until you've interacted with him/her at a more personal and intimate manner.

That said, I've really been lucky to find really nice people in school. Notwithstanding the world's usual stereotypes of lawyers, I've been blessed to be able to build friendships with a group of people who are so unassuming and actually, normal - people who bitch, people who laugh at lame jokes, people who crack lame jokes, people who write notes & cards, people who care enough to drop a message at times you never thought you would survive, people who bake, people who share notes, people who take time to entertain your questions/doubts, people who actually listen, people who offer a bona fide compliment, people who go beyond the superficial, people who really are genuine and sincere - people who do not want to lose their soul at the end of the day.

And along with that, I realised I'm not the only one who's actually pretty clueless why I'm in laws school, or whether I really want to be a lawyer next time. It's been a question that has been popping up quite a bit this semester. My contracts class was chatting with Prof Chin for quite a bit just now over lunch, and indeed, big names like VK Rajah, Andrew Phang, Sundaresh Menon, Shanmugam tutored by him in the past really have one passion - law. They have that intellectual brilliance, they loved talking about the law, loved reading about the law. Of course, I aim not to be as great as such people. But the very least I could do is to ask myself, what am I doing in law school?

Well, it's a pretty long story how I ended up in law school but for sure, I didn't choose law school because of passion. Had I followed passion, I would be pursuing a course in Chemistry, following which I would continue with Masters and subsequently, I would be happily (I believe) doing research. Or maybe a teacher.

That said, I don't hate law school. In fact, I really am enjoying every day in school and loving it actually. After all, whenever people ask me how's law school and studies, I'll invariably reply that it's really interesting and I enjoy myself. It's the truth. I love the thinking I get to do in law school, I love talking about the cases and the state of the law - how it should be, why certain things don't make sense, and the occasional discussion about Singapore politics where topics cross into it (like reading parliamentary debates for SLS last sem).

Still, that doesn't answer why I am in law school. It's like telling me I should be fortunate and self-contented because a lot of people want to get into law school but are unable to. With all respect, I think that's pretty irrelevant - it's just side-stepping the issue. I could do a course in philosophy, and I believe I would love the amount of thinking it throws at me; I could do a course in psychology, I would be highly intrigued by the way the human psyche works; I could do a course in natural sciences, I would happily be learning new concepts; I could do a course in mathematics, I would be happily doing math questions everyday and solving Calculus. The point is, liking law school and finding it interesting isn't quite the same as being sure this is my career path. It just says that I do not regret coming to law school.

Was chatting with Steve and indeed, how many people at the age of 19 know what they really want? Or rather, how many SINGAPOREAN youths at the age of 19 really know what they want to pursue as a career? There will be those rare few who have knows very clearly what they want, like my brother since his sec sch days, but these are the minority indeed. You see thousands of A levels students applying for university and racking their brains over which course to choose. So a lot end up choosing something, with the hope that they will not regret it. I'm glad to say I don't regret coming to law school, neither do most of my classmates. It's just, when we look into the future, we really ain't sure being a lawyer is how we want our lives to be.

After all, since young, I've always wanted to get a 9-5 job, pretty much like my dad, come home for dinner and then enjoy the rest of the night relaxing, spending time with my mum and watching the tv. But as I grow up, I guess realities of life start to creep in - the need for a steady income to buy a car, a house and many other more luxury items we all invariably want.

And so, it just gets a little sad whenever I hear people coming into law simply because of the money. Indeed, it's a big pull factor, but if that's the only sole reason you have, I really feel quite sad for you. Life is so much more than money. Yes, money is important, it's really important and can play a big part in life, but if it's your sole goal in life, then seriously, it's not up to me to say anything about it, I guess. At the very least, I'm really glad to have a group of friends who are not motivated by money in that way.

So after all these, where do I stand? If it's not for the money, then is it for the recognition/prestige? Well, I'll be lying if I say neither of the two is relevant. Indeed, they are contributory factors but definitely not the main ones, more so not the sole reason. I think, for myself, at the end of the day, it's still about the philosophical justice and fairness.

As for which area of law, and what sort of job I'm gonna get in future, well, I think I'll still leave it open. I won't deny that my interest is still criminal law and that I'll be taking Family Law in year 3, but after a year with contract with Chinty, I think I'm starting to appreciate the beauty of contract law, which is utterly bizarre given my utmost vehemence against it initially. But oh well, as SengHong and I were chatting about it just now, sometimes, the best things just hit you when it's the least expected and the least planned. Who ever knows, eh? To quote Joseph, serendipitous indeed. Ahh I think I've been reading too many academic articles lately (as evidently seen from the amounts of quotations I've been doing in this paragraph).

Anyways, as a sort of a closure for now, I'm glad to say that I've come into law school with an open mind, thoroughly enjoyed my course of study for a year, totally indulging in the kind of mental gymnastics and intellectual discourse I can get from this course, and much more unexpectedly than any, I've made myself many invaluable friends who are genuine and unassuming. As to why I'm in law school, I think maybe that's inconsequential. For now, I've been keeping to my maxim of making the most out of my uni days - including doing many more things apart from plain ol' mugging. Maybe it's time to re-evaluate and re-analyse all my commitments and time allocations, but I think I'll leave that to another day.

Because something is immoral doesn't mean it has to be a crime, and at the end of the day we still need to look at the moral culpability of the person.