And then I quickly asked myself why I wanted to have a kid. That brings me to the broader question of why do people want to have children?

Is it because we want to make sure that there is someone who will provide for us and take care of us when we are old?

Is it because we want to experience the 'joy of parenting' which the world tells us is one beyond words?

Is it because we love kids?

Is it because we want to exert some form of control over someone else's life?

Is it because we want to make sure there'll always be someone who will remember us after we die?

Is it because we want to (or we have to) carry on the family line?

Is it because we think that we'll make a better parent than some others?

Is it because we think that we'll make a good parent?

Is it because we just want to have sex and babies are a (not necessarily bad) by-product?

Is it because we want to inject some new element into our relationship?

Is it because we finally feel ready to have a child? And that still begs the question: why do you want to have a child?

Is it because that is the way society works?

Is it because that's the example we learn from our parents?

Is it because that's supposedly what we are supposed to do (after marriage)?

And then it struck me that from my limited generation of reasons/ideas above, they generally fall into 2 categories: (1) selfish reasons; or (2) societal norms.

(1) - hardly can we say that we want children because of some altruistic reason (well, of course if you think that satisfying your gramps' or your parents' wishes is altruistic then fine by me)

(2) - sometimes we don't really think much about it, because having children is just 'the way things go', or to quote someone from the previous generation: '如果你不生孩子，那你结婚来做什么？' (of course that goes into the topic of marriage, which isn't quite the topic here today)

I'm not saying that it's wrong to have kids, nor is either of the categories above wrong. I'm just pausing to reflect on why people actually want to have kids. Then of course there are those who fall into neither - I don't really bother whether I have kids or not, so if it comes then it comes.

All that said, either way, the child never ever gets to choose to be born (or not). I didn't choose to come into this world. That decision was made for me by my parents. And on that note, to those parents out there - if you decided to have a child, no matter how the child turns out, you are the one responsible for the child. And to those who love to lament '早知道就不把你生下来', too bad man, don't blame the child. You decided to have the child, so if you regret it, don't blame it on the kid. He's the most innocent one. In some sense, he's even the victim of your decision.

Nonetheless, that doesn't give us (as children) the reason to blame everything back on the lack of choice in coming into this world. Let's face it: none of us had that choice. So deal with it. Yes the world's unfair - no one ever tried convincing the world otherwise. If you wanna wallow in your the-world's-unfair pathetic state and get stuck in that rut, it's time to get your act together and live life like a man (or a woman).

*Really rambly thoughts today. Feels good typing without an essay question or word limit or restriction or academic grading in mind.